Morning Sickness (Original Poem)

I woke up this morning, with a massive headache.

Not knowing  where this life was taking me

I began questioning myself... Is God listening?

I felt defeated and broken. Its seemed as if God was trying to tell to me something

Or been trying to tell me something, But me being hard headed... I refuse to listen.

I went to church, but church didn't help.

They looked as me as if I wasn't worthy to be in God's presence.

To tell you the truth... neither did I

I mean, I hadn't exactly been created with bricks of holiness.

In my search for love, I came across... HIM

I was instantly enticed by his charming demeanor.

Its was something about this man. The way he walk, talked, smiled...

He was killing me softly, If you know what I mean.

Literally!! I felt myself becoming drained, empty to the point I felt I was loosing who I was.

See all the while I knew he wasn't God's plan for me

We are all created in his image and likeness.

But when he came along, he didn't shine like your son whose star shined from afar.

The ability to pray like Paul (in the new testament, he didn't acquire)

The courage to lead like prophet Jeremiah he didn't have.

Convincing this man to go to church with me was a challenge on its own.

Asking him to fast was irrational.

Then I thought to myself, why should I have to settle for a so-so man

When I serve a God of supreme power?

Why settle with one who has no fear for my God?

When I know the fear of God, is the beginning of wisdom.

So If waiting is what I have to do... then I will

I will seek the face of my father

I will give myself to him and him alone

For I know he has a perfect man for me.

-Miatta M. Sandy